Winter Jefferson posted a challenge on
Strawberry Singh's blog. It's about sharing how we overcame big disappointments in life - the ones where it seemed everything was broken and superglue would just not fix it.
I'm not going to share the details of my most shattering moment. There are worse things that can happen in life, but it was traumatic for me. What I will talk about is what helped me put my life back together afterwards - time, the loving support of friends and family, and giving my time and support to people who needed me.
First I grieved, listened to sad music, went through days and weeks like a robot, cried at the drop of a hat. Grieving is different for everyone, and the timeline for grief is individual. It takes however long it takes.
Also helpful was having people to talk to. Family and friends can
pull a smile out of you if you let them, and feed you tissues and tea
when you can't manage the smile.
Being needed pulled me away from grief though at first I didn't realize it. I just put one foot in front of the other. I had children who needed me to be Mom, no matter how I was feeling. These needs kept me on a schedule and moving daily, even when I didn't want to get out of bed. Tending to others helped me heal myself.
There's a final step necessary to overcoming major life crises, and that is forgiveness. I think some people mistake forgiveness for putting ourselves back in the same situation that caused the problem in the first place, but that's not what I mean. I mean forgiving the person who caused the hurt whether that person is oneself or someone else. It took me awhile (years), but when I forgave, I became lighter just by letting go of anger. Finally, I could truly move on with my life.
When I write it down like this it doesn't show how messy and hard and awful things were, or how many mistakes I made in trying to put my life back on track. But at the core those were the things that worked for me. They still do. Here's hoping something I wrote resonates for a certain someone who feels a little broken right now.
On to happier topics! I was seeing the specialty Pink Fuel skin on Plurk and Flickr. Because I was drooling over it, I went to the
Futurewave 2014 event to try it for myself. It comes with all the appliers I could think of! I also found this gorgeous
Zibska dress at the event. Oh and Future Dolly dyes her hair blue just for fun.
Credits:
Pink Fuel - Sora Alabaster - Blue
Pink Fuel - Sora Alabaster - Face Glow
IKON Spectral Eyes - Blue
Beetlebones Mesh Lashes V.01 (Dainty brown)
Zibska Dagmar ~ Vapour [3]
Maxi Gossamer - Bracelet - Nova Dream Moon
Slink Avatar Enhancement Hands
TRUTH HAIR Renata
